Nails
by White Firebird
Summary: Sometimes, even the toughest of nails bend. Not all nails are worth being reshaped. But she is. She's always been worth it.
1. Going away

**/T/**

"We don't have to go, you know."

I hear Andre's words roll around inside my head before finally settling in, making themselves cozy and reminding me that, yes, I don't have to go to this if I really don't want to. And, goodness knows, I _don't_. It's selfish of me to feel this way, but for once, I'm absolutely content to ride this wave of selfishness out. They'd understand, right? I mean, they even prefaced it with _'We'd love to see you, but we also get it if it's too much for you to grasp.'_

_'They',_ being Beck and, to a lesser extent, his parents.

Let me back up a little bit.

On our first day back after our spring break and the accompanying week off from school, Beck dropped the news that at the end of May, right after our Senior Prome, he was moving back home to Canada, to be closer to his grandma, who, he said, was in pretty rough shape physically. He's heading there first, and his parents are following suit a few weeks later once they settle everything with their house and all that other chiz.

To say that his announcement put a damper on the high we were all experiencing after detaching from reality and enjoying our break would be a gross understatement. It completely sucked the air out of the room and put everyone into a somber mood. Well, everyone except Jade, that is. She either knew beforehand, which, duh, she's his girlfriend, of course he'd tell her first, or she's doing her best to be as disaffected by it as possible. She's such a great actress, that it's really hard to tell with her sometimes.

Wait, did I just call Jade a great actress?

I mean, she is, but…

Never mind.

"Tor? You there? Earth to Tor, do you copy?"

I give my head a slight shake, snapping myself from my weird, unhappy thoughts. Turning around, I see that Andre's still leaning on my dresser, arms folded across his chest as he studies me, like one of the many textbooks sprawled along my bed. His lips have formed a straight line, one eyebrow raised upward, and it's almost an uncomfortable feeling, having him just stand there and watch me, waiting for me to say or do something, anything. Absently, I begin to rub my left hand up and down my right arm nervously, turning my neck so I don't have to look in his direction. I don't like it when Andre gets serious like this, hence the squirming. But once Beck told us of his intentions to go home, he's become a lot more serious and a lot less fun loving and jovial.

Everything's changing and I totally don't know how to deal.

"Do _you_ want to go?", I ask him, and he merely shrugs his shoulders. That's another thing that I've noticed about him ever since Beck's announcement. He's become a lot more evasive and indecisive. Before, he'd be up for any and everything. Now, unless I'm there, he doesn't want to do anything, and it's putting a strain on everyone. He's kind of like the glue that holds us all together, but now he's dissolving and unable to regain his sticky complexion, and we're all drifting apart because of it.

I run that thought back to myself a few times over, and it doesn't get any less ridiculous that I just compared my best friend to a household appliance, but it also doesn't make it any less true. I just, I always thought that even with our impending graduation right around the corner, we'd all stay in touch and keep up with one another's lives.

I guess I was just plain wrong about that one, huh?

"I asked you first", Andre says coolly, arms still folded across his chest, no longer leaning against my dresser, but now instead mere inches away from me. I can almost smell his minty breath from where I'm standing, and it's just really unnerving how unlike himself he's acting. It's almost as if it's someone else wearing his skin, like that one movie about these body snatcher things Jade keeps insisting we watch whenever we all have a movie night. These blobs take the form of humans and kill everyone? I don't know why she's so fascinated by it, but it's Jade, so it shouldn't surprise me. Wait, what was I saying?

Oh, that Andre's acting completely different from his normal self. _Wait…_

I immediately begin to poke his stomach, then his arms, my hands finally make their way to his face, and that's when he grabs my wrists, looking chizzed off as he drops them back at my side. "What are you doin', poking me like that?"

"Making sure you're real…"

He sighs in frustration, head dropping as he shakes it. "Did Jade make you watch that stupid alien movie with her again? Never mind. Are we going to Beck's going away party or not? Because it starts in a half hour, and I need to stop back home to grab his gift."

My eyes drift from him to my vanity, craning my neck and upper body to look at myself in the mirror. I really, really don't want to go. I don't want to face all these emotions and feelings that are threatening to pull us all apart long before we even graduate. I don't want to say goodbye to one of my friends, even if I know I'm still gonna see him on Monday and will continue to see him for a few more weeks, at the very least. I don't want to go to a funeral under the guise of a party. I just want to stay here and pretend that everything's gonna be fine. That everything's still gonna shine.

I sigh, turning fully to look at my reflection completely. "Get a grip, Vega", I mutter to myself, my hand running its way through my tangled hair. I have to be there for Beck. I can't hide from the overwhelming sense of dread that's threatening to encapsulate my entire body. I just need to face this head on, deal with it, and keep it moving. And it's not like Beck's leaving forever, right? He said it himself, that this isn't goodbye, it's merely _'see you later'._

"Give me twenty minutes, Andre, and I'll be ready", I say, smiling in his direction, hoping to extract one out of him as well. It takes a minute, but I'm pleasantly surprised to see him flash one back at me, and I hope that maybe he'll ditch this whole cold and distant demeanor he's recently adopted and be the Andre we all know and love.

He exits my room and I'm left alone as I begin to sift through my closet for something to wear, my thoughts repeating the same thing over and over.

I can do this.

* * *

Oh my gosh, I can't do this.

Andre and I got here ten minutes ago and I've already had to deal with Beck's mother sobbing hysterically and telling me that she wished none of this had to happen the way it was. And then that that was immediately followed up by Beck's father thanking me for being such a good friend to his son. I've literally been here for _ten minutes_ and I feel the overwhelming need to join his mother at the table and have a good old crying session. This is too much. I need to find a quiet place to process all of this. Come to think of it, I need to wazz too. Now, where did he say his bathroom was?

I politely excuse myself from the circle of family members I found myself in (and Andre, who gave me such a death stare as I left I felt a chill run down my spine) and enter Beck's house through his back door, trying not to get lost in the maze that is his family and living room. When I finally find what I think is the bathroom, I go to turn the handle, but I'm immediately stopped dead in my tracks by who's exiting.

"Jade."

"Vega."

The two of us stare at one another for a few seconds, unsure of what we could or even should say to each other. _'Hey, sorry your boyfriend is moving back home and leaving you, wanna talk?'_ **'Don't tell me everything's gonna be okay, we're not friends like that and I don't need your pity, okay?'** The growing silence between us starts to get uncomfortable, and I begin rubbing my arm anxiously again. Jade's staring at me much like Andre was earlier, but it's different. She's not examining me like I'm a frog waiting to be dissected in Mrs. Kessel's class, nor is she looking through me as if I'm some ghostly spirit. She's just…looking at me.

My eyes snap open, having not realized that I had even closed them. They flicker to the bathroom behind her, the very room she's seemingly denying me access to, seeing as she hasn't moved so much as an eyebrow since we ran into each other like this. Nothing about her seems off, until I keenly pick up the smallest smudge of mascara under her right eye; she had to have been crying in there before I arrived. Or she had an itch she needed to scratch. Who's to say with her?

"Can I go in there? Or is there as secret password I need to recite before entering?", I ask light-heartedly, trying to ease the tension surrounding us. It doesn't work at all; she's still just staring at me, her face unreadable. The only thing she does is twitch her lip upward ever so slightly before correcting course and remaining a blank slate.

"Jade…? I really need to wazz, can I please get in there before I explode?", the question comes out a little too beggy for my likes, but judging from how I've started to do the pee pee dance, I'm legitimately liable to burst at the seams any moment now. It's times like these that I curse my abnormally small bladder.

Finally, she gives her head a small shake, as if she were snapping out of a trance, and moves aside, and I rush right past her, breathlessly getting a 'thank you' out as I slam the door behind me. But something stops me right as I begin to finally do the deed.

Jade's voice.

"Hey, Vega. I just…um, you know. I just wanted to…thank you, for coming. I know you're taking this whole thing pretty rough, we all are…and um…yeah. I didn't think you'd come but…I—Beck's really glad you're here. It um…it means a lot to him…so thanks again."

If I wasn't currently sitting on the toilet, I'd have swung the door open and begun poking and prodding her much like I did Andre earlier. Was that her actually…being sincere? Did she almost say that she was glad I came out for this? I have so many questions that I need her to answer, so I finish up quickly and open the door, only to find that she's not there anymore. I make a mental note of this encounter, and I plan on making it a point to ask her if she's doing okay, if she's had any coffee today, or if this is her just going through the grieving process or just…

Without even realizing, my feet begin carrying the rest of my body back to the backyard, back into the little circle of Beck's cousins with Andre, back to the funeral like atmosphere. I hear the words they're all saying, but I'm not even pretending to act like I'm listening to them, I'm so preoccupied by Jade and her odd behavior. One of them offers their hand for shake, and Andre has to physically help me with the gesture, because I'm on an entirely different planet at this rate.

My mind is racing like a hamster on a wheel right now. Why was she acting so cordial towards me? I mean, we've actually become friends since the PMA's, but not like, _'stay up all night painting our toenails and gossiping about boys'_ friends like Cat and I are. So what was _with_ that? Is today opposite day and nobody passed the memo along to me? Andre's acting super serious; Jade's being nice…at Beck's going away party…

My mind comes to a screeching halt, the hamster having gotten off the wheel. The last time Jade was anywhere near this nice to me was when her and Beck broke up the first time. And come to think of it, she wasn't too terrible towards me when they broke up…the second time…

Oh my god.

I immediately grab Andre by the wrist and begin dragging him away from everyone, towards the gate that leads to the front yard. Before he can even begin to scold me for doing so, I blurt the words "I think Beck and Jade broke up again!" out, right in his face.

"What?", he asks, as if I didn't just scream it loud enough for everyone to hear.

"I think Beck and Jade broke up again", I repeat, this time much more calmly, but still with an edge of urgency in my voice. I can already tell what his follow up question is going to be, so I meet him halfway. "I ran into Jade as I was looking for the bathroom, and as I entered and went to do my business, she like…"

"She what? Burst in on you to tell you that those boots don't go with that top?"

I shoot him a side glare before continuing. "She thanked me for being here, said that we were all taking this pretty roughly, that she didn't think I'd show…"

"Okay, and this is abnormal behavior on Jade's part how…?"

"…she started to tell me that she was really glad that I came, but I guess she realized she was slipping and saying something nice so she said it was Beck who was happy that I was here. Have you even seen him since we got here?"

He shook his head, and I trudged ahead. "And when has Jade ever really been nice to me and happy to see me? When has she ever been happy to see anyone that isn't Beck?"

I could tell that he was processing my words, trying to see if there were any holes in them that he could poke at. "Tor, don't you think you're overreacting a bit? I mean, she said it herself, we're all taking this news hard. Maybe this is just her way of dealing with it? I mean, she had to know about it before any of us, of course she's gonna take it the hardest out of all of us…"

"But when they broke up the first time, she came to me. M-E. She_ haaaaated_ me back then. Like, with the fire of a thousand suns. And she was nice to me then!"

"Tor…"

"Then they broke up the second time, and she was kinda tolerable then with me too! And then there was that whole thing with the PMA's and me not kissing Beck and then—"

"Tori!"

The bass in his voice gets me to stop my ranting, my eyes flitting to him and his clearly exasperated demeanor. I can tell he just wants me to sloooow it down but how can he expect that of me right now?

"You said it yourself that you two have become friends ever since the PMA's, right?", he asks, then following up with another question before I can even answer his first one. "Did it _maybe_ occur to you that _maybe_ she's trying to be a good friend then? I mean, she's been a lot less…prickly, ever since Beck told us all this chiz. She's even put up with Trina and her Trina-ness without wanting to stab her with her scissors. I think this is just how she's choosing to cope with it."

"Yeah…yeah, you're probably right", I reluctantly agree, a sigh sliding through my teeth. "I just…I probably shouldn't be jumping to conclusions like that, right? It was so weird though…it's always weird when Jade's nice to me, even if we are kinda friends now…"

Andre placed a hand on my shoulder, doing his best to reassure me, but it's hard to feel that way when he's looking at me the way he is now, like I'm acting silly and need to be told as much. "Jade's just going through it right now, you know? We all are. This is just something we have to live with. Now why don't we go back out there and try to put on a happy face, huh?"

I nod, and that earns me another smile from Andre, even if it is a little tighter than usual. He wraps his arm around my shoulder and pulls me into his body as we begin walking back towards the funer—party. Cat, Robbie, Trina and even Sinjin are all here, and eventually Beck shows up, and that's when everyone converges around him. Everyone except Cat and I.

"Where's Jade?", I find myself asking, having not seen her since our little impromptu meeting outside the bathroom. "Why isn't she out here with Beck?"

Cat's body freezes, and she begins to absently plays with strands of her hair, her eyes everywhere but on me. I see her suck her upper lip into her mouth, like she's trying to decide whether or not to tell me what's obviously on her mind. "Um…I dunno, Tor. Beats me", she finally manages to get out, her head facing toward the crowd that's still surrounding Beck.

"Cat…", I drawl her name out, tapping her on the shoulder in an attempt to get her to face me. "Is there something you know that you're not telling me?"

She immediately and vehemently begins shaking her head, but she still won't look at me. I sigh again, not exactly proud of what I'm about to do, but it needs to get done nonetheless. "Cat…I'll take you to Freezy Queen if you tell me what's on your mind…and then we can go play baby golf when we're done. You like all those things, right?"

That finally gets her to turn and face me, her mouth in the shape of an 'o', looking simply aghast that I would do such a thing. "You're bribbing me!"

"I think you mean _'bribing'_…and yes, yes I am, and I'm not happy about it, but I need to know what's going on with Jade. Pleeeeeease Cat? Can you tell me what the deal is?", I all but beg as flash her my best smile and make eyes look as pleading as possible. "Please please please _pleeeeeeeease?_"

I could tell from the way her face was twisted up that she was struggling internally with what to do. Jade must've made her swear to secrecy not to tell anyone, but everyone with a working brain knows that Cat's the dirt worst when it comes to keeping secrets to herself. Do I feel terrible, leveraging this knowledge to my advantage? Yes, I absolutely do. But…I feel this sudden, staggering urge to see if Jade's okay. I don't think anyone, maybe outside of Cat, has bothered to see how she's really taking all of this. They probably just assumed that she'd be fine and move on with it. She's Jade West. She's tough as nails, right?

Well, sometimes, even nails bend.

"You can't tell Jade that I told you this, she'll cut all my hair off again and then bury me six inches deep!", she squeals, and I don't even bother to correct her and tell her that the saying is _'six feet under'_. However, I can tell that this is causing her a great deal of grief with how she keeps looking over her shoulder, as if she's expecting Jade herself to magically appear out of thin air next to her, scissors brandished and ready to snip. It takes me a minute or so, but I finally manage to calm her down and tell her that I promise not to say a word. She even makes me ankle swear on it, and so I humor her, because while yes, I really do need to know the tea, I also really want to make sure that Cat doesn't end up in a pet cemetery anytime soon.

Pet cemetery. Get it? Because her name's Cat. I crack myself up sometimes.

"Okay", Cat breaths out once we've finish ankle swearing. "So yeah…Beck's leaving, right? The day after he told us, she came over to work on a science project we have due…and like, before she was even inside my house, she just…broke down. I didn't know what to do, I've only ever seen Jade cry once, maybe twice the entire time we've been friends. I wanted to call you but she pleaded with me not to…so I didn't."

I merely nod my head, silently imploring her to continue, tucking that tidbit of Jade not wanting me to know away for another time.

"She said he told her during spring break that this was happening, and that they spent the entire week arguing and fighting about it. Like, they'd just wake up and start screaming at one another. She wanted to do long distance and make it work; he said it wouldn't be fair to her if he was in a different country with no guarantee of seeing her anytime soon. They just…it took big toll on her, Tor. She doesn't know if they're broken up or not, but she's acting like they are. That's why she's not here right now."

"Did they have another argument before any of us got here?", I find myself asking, although I already know the answer before Cat can give it to me. When she confirms my thoughts, my stomach drops all the way down to the very ankles I just shook and swore on. My eyes start scanning the area around us, finding no trace of Jade anywhere. I can hear Cat telling me about something else pertaining to our conversation, but I'm tuning her out much like I was Beck's cousins earlier. Where the heck is she? She'd at least want to keep up appearances, right?

"I don't think she's here, Tori", Cat's voice cuts in like a knife through butter, jarring me from my surveying. "I think she went home."

I turn and give Cat a big hug, the gesture saying more than I can right now. Thank you. I owe you one. She reciprocates it, her giggles lifting into the air as I let go and trek towards the back door to Beck's house, beginning my search for Jade in earnest in the living room. I have to find her. I have to.

I must search every room in the downstairs, not finding any trace of her, before Andre's voice echoes off the walls of what I believe to be Beck's dad's office, telling me that my presence is being requested by Beck himself. I groan; in all of my worrying about Jade's wellbeing, I kind of completely forgot that this is _his_ going away party, and that I'm here for _him_. I tell myself, though, that as soon as I'm done talking to Beck, I'm going to resume my search.

The second I'm out the door, my wrist is being yanked on by an overly eager Cat, who's also dragging a Rex-less Robbie along by the same appendage, towards the corner of Beck's backyard that has a makeshift fire pit set up, lawn chairs scattered about in a circle. Once we're there, Beck clears his throat, trying his best to not look as downtrodden as he probably feels.

"I uh. I'm gonna keep this as short as I can, because I don't want there to be this cloud of sadness hovering over all of us, you know? In the time that I've gotten to know you all, you guys have become like a second family to me, and I have enjoyed every moment that we've all spent together. But—", he stops, shaking his head, as if he was expecting this to be easier than he thought it would've been.

"But my first family needs me. Grandma's not in the best shape, to put it kindly. I don't know how much longer she's got, and that's why I have to go back. I have to be there for her. We all do…"

Cat leaves my side to wrap her tiny arms around him, like she's trying to prevent him from shattering, and soon enough we all converge on him in a group hug, but all the while, I'm thinking one thing as we break apart and then pose for a group photo.

Jade should be here.

A little while later, after we've all had our chance to speak to Beck personally and wish him and his family well, I sneak away and continue my search. It's not exactly easy, being sneaky when his family is literally everywhere, but I manage. Still, I find no trace of her. Anywhere. Maybe Cat was right and she really did go home. One look out the window of the upstairs bathroom seemingly confirms that, my eyes glancing over the driveway, her car nowhere to be found. A frustrated sigh escapes my throat as I plop down onto the toilet. I contemplate calling or texting her, but I know she won't answer. Maybe it's for the best if I don't see her right now, I begin to reason with myself. She's probably so wazzed off and would more than likely attempt to bite my head off if she saw me.

Quietly slipping out of the room and back down the stairs, Andre greets me and tells me that they've got the fire started up and everyone's gonna make s'mores. And while I would normally be all about that, I just…something within me compels me to tell him that I'm gonna pass, that I'm tired, that the weight of all of this is wearing me down. He quirks a brow up at me, lips curled into something resembling disappointment, but he doesn't argue with me. He offers me a ride home, but I can tell how much he wants to stay, so I tell him that I'll just call an Uber and text him when I'm home.

After an awkwardly tense hug, I make sure to find Beck and everyone else and say our goodbyes. I can tell that the reality of the situation is beginning to hit him, but I have to wonder how much of it is the fact that he's leaving, and how much of it is the fact that him and Jade have been fighting for the better part of the last two weeks. I try to push the thoughts out of my head as I wait by the curb for my ride to arrive.

But the strangest thing draws my attention away from the streets; Beck's trailer. It's…moving? There's someone or something inside of it, and it's shaking back and forth. At first I think it's the rottweiler Jade got him, but I quickly realize it isn't because I hear voices coming from inside, and, well, dogs can't speak. Yet.

Going against my better judgment (which was telling me in no uncertain terms to **STAY BY THE CURB** in all caps), I slowly begin making my way to the door, praying to whatever powerful figure upstairs in the clouds that I won't die because I let my curiosity get the best of me. As soon as I get within reaching distance of the handle, the door swings open, nearly making me wazz my pants. And standing in the doorway of Beck's trailer is, to my complete surprise, a very drunk, very disheveled looking…

"Jade?"

"Vegaaaaaaaa! How you doinnnn."

I stare at her, my mind immediately asking questions that I don't have the answers to. How long has she been in there? How much has she had to drink? Why didn't she just go home? I'm so wrapped up in wondering why she's in the condition she's currently in, that I almost forget that I called an Uber, and said Uber is honking his horn at me, nonverbally telling me to get my butt in the car or he's leaving.

My head snaps back and forth between my waiting ride and Jade, who's taken to slurring her words heavily and slumping against the side of the door frame. I can't just leave her here like this, but how is she gonna get home? Before I can even think of an answer to the question I just posed to myself, I whip around and silently plead with my driver to wait just one more minute, gesturing to the drunk Jade in front of me. I can see him roll his eyes, tapping his finger to the watch on his wrist, as if to tell me that I have exactly one minute or he's gone.

Pushing past her into the trailer, I gather up her belongings and then force my way out, reaching behind me to grab her wrist and literally drag her to the car with me. It's no easy feat, seeing as she's about as loaded as my Uncle Cesar on Thanksgiving and has basically become dead weight. But I carry on, finally getting her into the car as safely as I can, my driver glaring at me in his rearview mirror. I quietly slip him a twenty from my wallet (goodbye, lunch money), and reassure him that my drunken friend won't yak all over the backseat of his Prius.

The entire ride home is spent in relative silence, save for the few times Jade mutters something about the earrings I'm wearing and how the world is spinning. I do my best to keep her relaxed, but it's not until I begin running my hand through her thick black curls that she, well, relaxes.

Eventually, we arrive at my house, and I thank Jeebus that my parents are in San Francisco visiting my abuelos and they decided to force Trina to go with them. After finally getting Jade out of the car, with great difficulty and a lot of stopping and starting, I manage to get her inside, up the stairs, into my room and onto my bed.

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, I can't help but stare at Jade's sleeping (?) form, and I begin to wonder just what she dreams about, or if she's even having any dreams at all right now. I can't even begin to imagine just how hard she has to be taking this whole _'Beck's going back home'_ news if she got herself this plastered. He means so much to her, it has to be crushing her inside.

I sigh, my hand finding its way to her ankle. Her skin is flush and practically sizzling; she must've drunk more than I thought. I give her a light shake before sliding her boots off, and as I begin the process of tucking her in underneath the sheets, she suddenly becomes alert and snatches my wrist in her grip, our eyes now locked onto one another.

We remain that way, in silence, before she mutters something softly about wanting tacos. Her grip relaxes, and she finally dozes off shortly thereafter, allowing me the opportunity to tuck her in nice and tight.

In those few seconds where we were staring into each other's eyes, I saw such a range of different emotions behind those teal hues. Hurt. Shock. Confusion. Anger. Anxiousness.

Jade would never admit this out loud, but she needs a friend. She needs someone who will help her pick up the pieces, to help her cope with this separation. She needs someone to remind her that she's Jade freaking West. That she's as tough as nails.

Right before I fall asleep myself, I reach down and take her hand in my own, making our fingers tangle together as my actions convey the words that I'm thinking.

_I'm here, Jade. I'm not going anywhere._

_I'll be that friend._

* * *

**Whoops, went ahead and started a new story about Jori out of nowhere. Funny how inspiration strikes like that, right? Hope you enjoyed the first chapter! See ya soon!**


	2. Friends, pt 1

**/J/**

_"Hey, Vega. I just…um, you know. I just wanted to…thank you, for coming. I know you're taking this whole thing pretty rough, we all are…and um…yeah. I didn't think you'd come but…I—Beck's really glad you're here. It um…it means a lot to him…so thanks again."_

My eyes snap open, looking up at the off white ceiling and the globe shaped light, the fan surrounding it slowly rotating on its lowest setting. I try to sit up, to try and gain my bearings and scope out my surroundings, but the painful sensation of my brain vibrating against my skull quickly puts the kibosh on that idea, so I'm immediately lying flat on my back again, a dull thumping in my forehead, as if my brain is trying to break free of its cage. From my vantage point, I know that this isn't my room, like the fan and color of the ceiling weren't enough of a giveaway, but it isn't Beck's either. No, this room is completely foreign to me.

I grab at the sheets, hands fisting in the blankets, only to find that I occupy this bed alone. Lazily and, due to the severe pain in my head, quite agonizingly, I somehow manage to turn onto my side, to try and see just where I am, and that's when I glance down and see Tori, limbs sprawled out on a sleeping bag, a mess of brown hair covering most of her face. Her chest heaves slowly, up and down, and that's when I realize that I'm in _her_ house, in _her_ room, on _her bed_.

Slowly, memories of last night begin to come back to me; another argument with Beck, this one nastier than the last few. Crying hysterically while he stood there, making no effort to try and see if I was okay or to calm me down. Sequestering myself away in his basement bathroom. Running into Tori. Everything after that is hazy…I remember breaking into Bob…_Mr. Oliver's_ liquor closet and stealing myself a _whoooole_ bottle of vodka, and I vaguely remember telling Beck to fuck off when he tried to prevent me from drinking more…

I'm stirred from my recollections of the previous evening when Tori turns onto her side, eyes still filled with sleep as they connect with mine. She manages the tiniest of smiles, looking up at me from her spot on the floor, stifling a yawn as she does so. "Morning, sleepy head", she murmurs, and in that moment, with the sun peeking through the curtains and capturing her eyes, turning them an unreal mixture of golden brown, I'm utterly floored at how pretty she looks when she's just waking up in the morning.

Wait, did I just call Tori **pretty?**

Well, duh, anyone with functioning eyes could see that…

Whatever.

No words leave my lips, because apparently the part of my brain that controls my vocal chords has been beaten and bludgeoned enough by my migraine that speaking is proving to be a difficult task right now. So I merely nod my head, and God, even that hurts, and all I want to do right now is curl up into a ball and die right now. I'm the first one to admit that I enjoy pain, but this isn't the good kind of pain; this is the kind of pain that's beginning to make me question my place in life, the kind that's making me want to jump off of a bridge and go splat on the ground if it means my head will stop throbbing.

I've had hangovers before, but this is the final boss level of hangovers.

Pressing my palms into my eyes, I try to will the pain away, obviously to no avail, unaware of the bed suddenly dipping underneath the weight of Tori joining me. Her delicate little hand finds my wrist and gently tugs my hand away from one eye, before reaching across my face and doing the same with my other hand.

My first instinct is to tell her to stop, to scream at her and say something mean spirited, but I'm in no condition to be a bitch to her today, so I lie perfectly still as she scoops black curls of mine behind my ears, it being her turn to stare at me, much like I did to her yesterday. It doesn't faze me like I know it would her if the roles were reversed, but I will admit that it's a little unlike her to do something like this and not be chirping about _something_.

Suddenly, her voice blurts out a question about whether or not I'm okay. It takes every ounce of energy to roll my eyes at her, my lips pressed into a thin line as my hand lazily points to my forehead.

"Does it _look_ like I'm okay, Vega?"

She falters for a second before regaining her composure. "I'm just trying to help, Jade."

I sigh, closing my eyes once more, cursing myself and this damn hangover.

Ever since everything with the PMA's went down, we've reached a somewhat uneasy balance to…whatever the hell this is. Friendship? I mean, I guess you could call it that. We've hung out a lot more than we did when she first started going to Hollywood Arts, and I've been noticeably less…vicious, with her as opposed to before. But that doesn't necessarily mean we've become the best of friends, like she is with Cat and Andre. I'm still plenty rude to her on occasion…though lately, I've been finding myself apologizing for it.

I know, right? Me, apologizing for being rude. _To Tori_. If you had told me a couple of years ago that I'd ever end up apologizing to her about anything and actually being sincere about it, I'd have introduced your eyeballs to my finest pair of scissors. That were soaked in battery acid.

"Why did you drink so much?"

The question catches me off guard; my mind immediately jumps to a conclusion that I don't want it to. Does she know about Beck and I? No, that can't be. I threatened Cat under the guise of cutting all of her hair off again if she told anyone about what's going on between me and him. However, this is Cat we're talking about here. I love the girl (though I'd never admit that out loud to anyone), but if you poke and prod her even the tiniest bit, she'd crack and spill the beans.

I look over to Tori, who's still staring at me, an expectant look hiding behind those brown irises, and maybe she doesn't know anything about what's going on between Beck and I. With the exception of my disappearing act and subsequent drunken thrashing of his trailer, him and I have both been doing a good job of keeping any simmering issues between us just that; between us. Sure, there was that one incident where I broke down crying to Cat at her house, but other than that…

"It was a party, Vega. You drink at parties."

She gives me this look, like she's not buying any of my bullshit, but part of what makes me such a great actress is committing to whatever I'm doing. So if I'm going to give Tori the run around, I'm going to be as annoying and stubborn about it as I can possibly be. She's not getting anything out of me that easily, if at all.

"Okay, but normally, when you drink at parties, you, y'know, eventually cut yourself off."

"I wasn't that drunk."

"Jade, you could barely stand up straight."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Her left eye twitches ever so slightly, lower lip being chewed on vigorously. I can tell that I'm already starting to irritate her, and that point is only driven further home when I hear her mutter something under her breath in Spanish. I don't know what exactly she said, but it must've been bad, because her cheeks turn a soft shade of pink and she scolds herself for it, all with my watchful eyes on her. Not that she bothered to notice, though, because she seemed to be off in her own little world there for a second.

After she's done reading herself the riot act, her attention focuses back on me, and whatever irritation that she had with me has now faded away, and she's gone back to staring at me. This time, however, it doesn't last very long, as her eyes are drawn to the sound of her bedroom door swinging open and smacking against the wall.

There stood Trina in the doorway, with some unknown, gross looking substance globbed all over her face. She looked like she had just walked off the set of a John Carpenter movie.

Actually, no, wait, I take that back.

That's an insult to John Carpenter and his fine work.

She looks like something that tool Uwe Boll would've cocked up.

"What'd you do with my hairbrush?", she sneers in Tori's direction, narrowed eyes barely giving me a once over before eyeing her sister up again. "I can't brush my beautiful locks if you're using it to do…whatever it is you do with _your_ head", she adds, arms folded across her chest, her hip jutting out as she rested on her left foot.

I can see Tori narrowing her eyes, her lips in a flat, straight line, arms extended outward as if to say **'What the fuck?'**. "I thought you went with Mom and Dad to visit Grandma and Grandpa?"

The she-beast rolls her eyes, like being asked that was the dumbest thing in the world to her. "You really thought that those two were gonna leave you home alone for the entire weekend? What're you, new?"

I can tell that Tori's trying (and failing) to keep her composure, but it's hard when you're dealing with someone as airheaded as Trina. "Treen, please, this isn't a good time, can you please just—"

"I'll go when you give me back my hairbrush! I've told you not to touch my stuff, and I can't have my hair looking all frizzy and messy like yours so—"

I don't know what comes over me, or where I even get the strength to ignore this damn hangover, but before Tori can tell her janky ass sister to, again, politely buzz off, I'm already beating her to the punch, sitting straight up and glaring daggers at Trina. "You're not gonna be able to brush anything if you keep talking to her like that", I threaten, reaching into the waistband of my jeans and producing my backup scissors, brandishing them in her direction. "Now **go**."

She hesitates for the briefest of moments, as if she's about to tell me that I'm bluffing, but the second that it looks like I'm going to make even the slightest movement off the bed and in her direction, she's scurrying down the hall, the sound of her own bedroom door slamming shut confirming that she wouldn't be a bother anymore. As soon as that happens, I groan, the pounding in my head somehow having gotten worse as I flop back down onto the bed and resume the staring contest that I'm having with the ceiling. Spoiler alert; the ceiling wins every time.

What I don't see until a few seconds later, though, is the way Tori's staring at me _this_ time. She's somewhere between shock and appreciation, and I can see why, but at the same time, I didn't do that so much for her sake as I did for my own. There's only so much Trina any normal human can take, and if I had to listen to her continue to speak, especially given the current state that I'm in, I would've been left with no option but to slice her to ribbons. Part of me even thinks that Tori would let me do it, even if it was her own sister being cut up and mutilated. It's a wonder she hasn't tried murdering Trina herself.

"Where did you get…how did…you keep a pair of scissors in your pants!?"

I shrug, like keeping a pair there is the simplest thing in the world. "Well, you took my boots off and I usually keep a pair in there too, so…"

Her head begins shaking, like this is information overload. I can't help but laugh at how she's taking this news, like its earth shattering and her brain is breaking because of it. But then again, I wouldn't expect her to know where I keep all of my scissors hidden on me. Only a select few know…Cat, _Beck_…

My head begins pulsating again at the mere thought of his name, causing me to groan and turn onto my stomach, my face buried in the pillows. The pain in my head is nowhere near as bad as the pain in my chest, my heart thumping sadly against my ribs. My eyes are closed, a familiar stinging signaling that tears were about to make another appearance. Before I can even try to will them away, they're falling, and I know I shouldn't be thinking something as silly as this, but I'm so mad that I'm doing this in front of Tori. **Again**. I don't want her to see me like this, not after the first time Beck and I broke up…and yet…here I am. Crying into the pillows on her bed. All while she, I'm assuming, is staring at me with that same dumbfounded look she always wears whenever I'm actually nice to her, or she doesn't know how to respond and react to something I do.

Déjà vu much?

The feeling of her hand on my back catches the sobs in my throat. At first I'm not sure of what her intentions are, but no sooner do I think that, she's rubbing up and down my spine in a calming, almost soothing manner. This time, I'm not ashamed to admit that this feels…nice. Even if this is under less than ideal circumstances for me. It's just…I guess it's just nice to know that she's trying to be a good friend, even if I know I don't necessarily deserve that.

"Do you have any ibuprofen?", my muffled, strained voice comes out from underneath the pillows. I can feel her moving around on the bed, the springs jumping up and down from the shifts in weight. Turning my head to the side to see just what the hell she's doing, I'm quickly met by her hand being thrusted into my face, the item I requested resting in her palm, four tiny blue lifesavers waiting to be swallowed and digested by my stomach acid.

"I left them on the nightstand for you, just in case", her words come out softly. She jerks the thumb on her free hand to the nightstand in question, a glass of water resting on it as well, and wow. I knew that Tori was thoughtful, but this…

The weight of the bed shifts once more, and I'm on here by myself again as I eye her movements. Right now she's sitting at her vanity, yanking what I assume to be Trina's hairbrush (good) through her tangled, knotted up mess of hair…she's whispering to herself in Spanish again. I'm making it a point to start learning the language so I can understand just what in the hell she's saying when she gets like this…which would imply…never mind.

Soon after swallowing my pills, I sit up, happy that the throbbing is duller and not as _'make me kill myself'_ painful as it was a few minutes ago. "So Vega", I start off then quickly stop, realizing that I have nothing to offer up beyond what I just said. My eyes dart from her to the door to her bathroom, to her mirror, to her walls, then back to her again. All the while, she's giving me an expectant look, waiting to see what else I could possibly have to say.

"Yes, Jade?"

"Um…"

Tori smiles, standing up from her chair to reach out and take my hand in her own. What I want to do is to immediately snatch it away from her, to scold her for touching me, but none of those mean spirited words come to the forefront of my mind once she begins rubbing the pad of her thumb along the back of my hand. Once again I find myself thinking that this feels…nice. I should be pissed that she's seemingly able to calm me down in such a simplistic manner, but I'm oddly not. I can't explain why. I don't even bother to.

"You're welcome, Jade", she says, her words wrapped in enough warmth I'd think she was trying to smother me with a blanket. "But you really don't need to thank me…I'd like to think that if the situation were ever reversed, you'd do the same for me."

Now it's me who's giving her a dumbfounded, shocked look as she beams at me like the fucking sun, before letting go of my hand and exiting her room. I continue to stare at the space she just occupied, my mouth still agape. Rarely am I ever speechless, but somehow Tori has rendered me a stuttering mess. I should be furious that she just assumed that I was going to thank her for making sure I was brought back here safe and sound, but I can't be as bent out of shape about it as I want to be…

…because I _was_ going to thank her for making sure I got here okay. God damn it.

Once I'm feeling okay enough to begin walking around and acting like a functioning human again, I slide off her bed and find my phone down on the floor by my boots…damn, she even made sure it was fully charged? Tori really went the extra mile.

Pressing the home button to open up my phone, I'm immediately met by an overwhelming amount of notifications…seven missed calls, all from Cat…and a whopping twelve texts…three from Cat, all asking where I was and if I was okay…the rest from Beck…he asks the same thing as Cat, if I'm okay and where I am, if I'm home or not. I plan on just ignoring them all and letting him twist in the wind as to my whereabouts, until I read the last one he sent, earlier this morning.

_I'm sorry._

My heart body slams against my ribs, blood is rushing to my ears and my entire body damn near goes limp. My eyes are laser focused on the screen and those two little words. That's all they should be, right? Just two words. Except these two words are carry so much weight behind them that I'm only mildly surprised my screen didn't crack under the pressure.

What do I even say? _Do_ I even say anything? What's he got to be sorry about? What does he even expect my response to be? Where does he get off being sorry? He's the one that doesn't want to try and make everything work, not me. I cut open a figurative vein in front of him and bled my feelings everywhere yesterday. I practically begged him to consider my stance, and I don't beg for _anything_. And what did he do? He just stood there and said nothing. No-thing. Not a damn word. And I'm supposed to believe him when he says that he's sorry?

I angrily shove my phone into my purse and march out of Tori's room and straight into the bathroom across the hall.

I want to scream. I want to cry again. I want to punch him in his perfect little face. I want him to not leave me. I want things to remain the same. I don't like change…anyone who says that change is a good thing is lying to themselves and completely full of shit. More importantly, I want us to work. I don't give two rats asses if he's going to be north of the border. We're Beck and Jade. We've been through so, so much worse than this, and we've gotten back together. We've persevered. We've become stronger.

And now he just wants to throw everything we've worked so hard on away because he's going home? I understand that yes, Grandma Louise is in bad shape, and who knows how much longer she has. I admire the fact that he's putting his life and career on hold to take care of her. I've told him that numerous times. But just because he's leaving doesn't mean that everything just has to come to a sudden end…I find myself asking the same question I asked him, repeatedly, last night while I was crying my eyes out to him.

Why won't he fight for me?

I hadn't realized it until now, but my hands are shaking. Literally fucking shaking. I don't know if I should be worried or just accept that I have so many different…emotions (I hate that word) coursing through my veins that my body doesn't know how to handle this sudden change. As I drop down onto the toilet, I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and it spooks me a little when I realize that I don't know the person staring back at me in the reflection.

Rarely do I ever get hysterical like this. I can count the amount of times I've acted this way on one hand. But fuck if this isn't hitting me a different way than anything else that's made me feel like this. Why won't he fight for me? Maybe it's the fact that I still feel somewhat drunk, or maybe it's my hormones, or something else entirely, but I don't feel like myself. If I'm being honest, I haven't felt like myself ever since Beck told me of his intention to go home.

That was three weeks ago. Look at me now.

I push my hands through my hair before letting them fall limply into my lap. I don't even bother to try and stop the few tears that form in the corner of my eyes, even though crying only makes my head hurt even more. Again, I find myself repeating that goddamn question over and over to myself.

_Why won't he fight for me?_

"Whoever's in there, can you please hurry up?", I hear Trina whine on the other side of the door, pounding on it, as if that's going to make me open it even faster. I have no intention of getting up any time soon, but that doesn't stop her from continuously banging on the door like the brat that she is. Maybe she'll take the hint and fuck off.

"Open the door! I need to exfoliate!"

Or maybe cats will gain the ability to speak.

I chuckle. Cat already does know how to speak. And she's as much a pet as she is a human girl.

"I'm gonna count to five, and I swear, if you're not out of there by then I'll—"

"You'll what?", I say as I fling the door open, causing her to take a step or three back. The words leave my lips with as much anger as I can possibly gather right now. Which, given said anger is being directed at the lesser of the two Vega sisters, is a lot. "Please finish that sentence for me, Trina."

She stammers out some half-assed apology for interrupting my time in there, and tells me to take as long as I need to, her eyes pleading with me to not stab her to death in her own home. The only thing I can muster is an eye roll as I shove past her and take a sharp right turn towards the Vega's living room, wondering just what the heck Tori was up to that could be keeping her so preoccupied.

When I reach the living room, Tori's in the kitchen with her back to me, fiddling around with…plates? A spoon? It's hard to tell what exactly she's doing, so, me being me, I decide to sneak up behind her as quietly as I can so I can spook her and maybe make her piss her pants a little. I'll take whatever I can get at this point, honestly.

"Is this really how you want to repay the girl who just got you tacos?"

I stop dead in my tracks, arms dropped down to my side and my smile having faded away. How did she even know I was here? And what did she say about tacos?

"Seriously Jade? I've known you for close to four years. I know when you're trying to scare me."

Oh. "Oh." It's all I can manage to say right now as I diligently watch her sweep around the kitchen like a tornado of brown hair. Before I can even say another word, the kitchen table is set, and in front of me is a plate full of…tacos. "When did you find the time to make tacos?"

She smiles, and right there I make a mental note of how impossibly, and perfectly sculpted, her cheekbones are. How have I never noticed them before? I mean, I've noticed them, but I've never _noticed them_. There's no way they're actually real. They have to be implants of some kind, right? I just…

Before I can even stop myself, I'm walking past the table to where she's standing, by the microwave, hands extended out. She gives me a weirded out look, but she doesn't make any attempt to stop me as my fingers begin poking and prodding the cheek bones in question.

"Having fun there?"

"How do you get cheekbones like this..."

"Jade", she says as she lightly grabs my wrists and sets them back down at my sides. "How about we get some food in your stomach, okay? And then you can jab and prick at my cheekbones all day if you want. Just eat first though. Please?"

My eyes drift back over to the table and it's then that I remember my second inquiry has gone ignored up to this point. "You never answered my question."

"I didn't make them, I ordered them from El Taco Guapo", she stated simply as she sits down at the head of the table, and begins to dig in.

"That then begs the question of…why tacos? It's ten in the morning."

She shrugs as she takes another bite, swallowing before answering with, "There's never a bad time to have tacos, Jade…and besides, you talked about them so much last night, I figured you were still craving them."

Wait, what? I suddenly feel like that old lady meme where she's looking on at something with such confusion written across her face. When did I ever talk about them? I'm so baffled by Tori's statement that I don't even think to start eating. I'm just looking down at the plate in front of me, trying to remember any details from last night that might've slipped through the cracks.

"When did…?"

"During the car ride home last night", she says, popping a stray tomato into her mouth without missing a beat or so much as looking up at me. "You kept saying how hungry you were, and how all you wanted was a double decker supremo…you also mentioned something about the world spinning and my earrings, but I just figured that was the alcohol speaking. Oh, and you said something about them before you finally passed out. So I figured, why not?"

I'm giving her that same dumbfounded look from before. This girl went out of her way to make sure that I got here safely, tucked me in, made sure my phone was fully charged, left some aspirin and water for me on her nightstand, and now she ordered tacos for me, all because my super drunk ass was rambling on and on about them? What's next, she's gonna tell me that she's secretly training to become a nun?

Wait, can you actually train to become a nun? How would that even work?

I'm getting distracted.

"I…thank you", I find myself muttering out loud, because even I had to admit that Tori has gone above and beyond the call of fucking duty today. Why she performed all these saintly acts for me, I probably won't understand, but I'm not that much of a gank to not be grateful for all of this.

"It's fine, Jade, really", she says, finally looking up to meet my eyes, that ever present smile of hers plastered all along her lips. "What are friends for?"

My eyes darken and my lips purse together. "Are we friends, though?"

That's enough to give her pause and stop the ongoing destruction of her taco. "I mean, we're not friends like I'm friends with Andre and Cat. But that doesn't mean that we're not friends."

"I've been nothing but a total bitch to you."

"You've been a lot nicer lately, too."

"That still doesn't erase the fact that more often than not, I've gone out of my way to be a grunge to you."

She shrugs her shoulder, as if my previous behavior towards her was no big deal. "That's all behind us now, Jade."

"I took your spot in the PMA's", I counter, grasping at straws when I really shouldn't be. I just can't fathom why she's being so nice to me when I've done nothing to deserve this.

"But then you gave it back to me. What were your exact words? _'I can't do that to a friend. Or even to you.'_"

I had nothing for that. For any of it. I could only bring myself to ask one more thing. "Why?"

Her next words just about stopped my heart and caused all the blood in my body to become scorching hot as it rose into my throat and my ears.

"Because I care about you, Jade."

I begin crying on the spot.

* * *

**When I posted the first chapter of this new story, I already had half of this chapter written and plotted out so...here you go! Enjoy!**


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